E is for Equality

Intro

Depending on how you read things, it's easy to assume that equality is a problem of the past.  But is it?  It's not as straight forward as we might think, at first glance, no matter what our instinctive response may be.

E is for Equality

Beyond the most basic of human needs that ensure our ability to continue living - air, food, water, warmth and so on - there is the human need that, one way or another, defines our existence: the need for love, connection, relationship, call it what you will.  Our ability to have this need met defines us as individuals, and our inability to have it met defines us as a society (whether local, national or global).

It is a sobering thought that even with the meeting of its basic physical needs, without meeting its most basic emotional need for love, a newborn baby will simply die.

What is more sobering still, is that in many societies throughout the world, female babies are allowed to die, are literally thrown away or simply treated as less important than their male siblings.

I commend to your reading, at this point, the book "Half the Sky" by Nicholas D Kristof and Sheryl Wu Dunn.  I find it amazing that the title of the book is based on a phrase coined by Mao Tse Tung, as in "Women hold up half the sky."
That simple pronouncement is the reason that China has a far higher ratio of engaged female workers than would, quite likely, otherwise be the case.

I'm not going to belabour the point of inequality: the book is rife with it.  And if you don't feel like trawling through the whole book, have a scout of the movement's website.

But there are two points that seem most important to me:
1) It is not only men, but women as well that are perpetuating the cycle of inequality.  I have seen this first-hand in Georgia, even heard it from girls' and womens' own mouths, that it is their husband's right to mistreat them in whatever way they feel fit.  The reason for this is no doubt cultural, from a time where having a husband was a right to life, being without a husband was a passive invitation to be molested, raped and or bride-napped, and it was socio-economically impossible to survive as a single, individual woman.

2) The inequality goes both ways: the story of Meghalaya, India is as recent as January 19th 2012.  In this state of north-east India, men are the down-at-heels citizens, fighting for their right to equal treatment.  What interests me most about this is that the leader of the movement cites the inequality as the reason for men's disengagement at all levels, including alcoholism and drug abuse.  My interest in this is that the same behaviours are cited as symptoms of inequality in the other direction.

Closer to home, there are frequent media references to the fact that women are generally paid less than their male counterparts in any given profession/field.

The second point above gives me cause to wonder: what is it that men think they have accomplished that they mentally give themselves license to sit back and do nothing?  I can only come up with one answer: they have created an attitude among themselves that is also widespread among women: that women exist only to do a man's bidding, to bear his children and tidy up after him.

Men are overgrown children.

Last year in Georgia, my host family consisted of two grandparents, two parents and two small children.  The boy was maybe 4 years old.  One evening, tired of all his lip, the Mother - having told him several times to stop licking food out of his bowl - tapped him firmly in the mouth.  The resulting screaming fit was not surprising - the shock of it would have done something similar to most of us.  What shocked me was his raised hand and how close he came to hitting his Mother back.  At 4 years old.

Based on this seemingly intrinsic global outlook, one could be forgiven a) for laying all of humanity's problems at the feet of men and b) for placing all one's hope in the emancipation of women.

Indeed the book 'Half the Sky' falls very little short of this attitude.  But on the other hand it cites numerous examples of why this attitude is not unreasonable.  From international health initiatives to grassroot microfinance organisations, the focus is largely on women - the former because of the massive need associated with pregnancy and childbirth, the latter because they make more reliable clients virtually every time.

E is for Empowerment

With the example of Meghalaya as a base, it is easy enough to conceive of a world where the tables are turned and men are fighting for equality on a global scale.  If this happens it won't be because enough men have given enough women enough opportunities to take over existing companies, it will be because of the opposite: the chauvinistic attitudes of today will still abound and as such, women everywhere will become gifted, innovative entrepreneurs with enough market dominance to drive male-dominated companies out of business.

That is why E is for Empowerment: the only way to acheive and maintain equality is to ensure that ALL people are empowered.

There is only one difference between people who 'succeed' and people who 'fail' (I use these terms loosely to avoid the idea that certain things count as failure and certain things as success: the only definition of either is the attitude of the individual):

The successful don't give up.

Behind the dogged determination of the successful there may be numerous things like flexibility/fluidity (to circumstances of all kinds), psychological tools for self-motivation, back-up plans, or what have you.  But the successful never give up.  Many people in the UK have already given up: they have swallowed the lies of society for so long that they no longer even remember what their dreams were.

I see this all around me in my friends as much as anywhere else: people are rudderless, devoid of imagination.  Whatever flare and vitality they once had has been dimmed.  There are exceptions of various kinds that I thrill to see, and there are those who command respect for their choices because they have decided that some end or other (whether frequent travel or maintaining a long distance relationship) justifies the means of saving dreams for another time.

If I could wish anything for my life it would be the constant empowerment of people around me.  We are all capable of so much more than we pretend to be.

The main 'complaint' I hear is that people don't know what to do.  I fell into that category myself until recently.  For that reason I frequently recommend the book 'What Colour is Your Parachute', by Richard N Bolles.
Unlike many other books/tools, this one doesn't try to find you your ideal job or career or even job sector.  Through various means it helps you to determine your skills on a more general level, the kind of place you would want to live geographically, the kinds of people you would want to be surrounded by and so on.  And I suspect that each area will have different values for each person.  My own was finding a job that I would feel worthy of my full attention/commitment and the 'sacrifices' I make are in order to attain my goal; others may focus on living in the 'perfect place', others on surrounding themselves with the 'perfect group of friends' or finding the 'perfect person'.

After that, there are two simple tools that I commend to you.  They are mine, and they are recommendations from my friend, Bonnie:
1) Act with courtesy.  This is such a simple thing and yet it is infinitely powerful.  To act with courtesy takes skill and courage when it is to be a universal application.  Anyone can pretend to be courteous when it suits them, but how many can maintain it in the face of someone else's discourtesy?
Enlarging upon this is to act with love.  Anyone can see what is happening on the surface of a person's life: we see joy, we see misery, we see pain, we see rage.  But how often do we take the trouble to see beyond that?  And how often do we (mentally) chastise people for their inability/refusal to treat us better because of the pain we feel?
This leads us to the second, because love opens doors...

2) Take the open door.  Or as Bonnie puts it: Is this how I want my life to be?  Your life is not the feelings of joy you had yesterday for whatever reason, and it is not the 'better' that your life will be tomorrow when things are 'back to normal'.
THIS is your life.  Right now.  How does it look?  How does it feel?  And if it isn't what you hope(d) for, what can you do about it?
Ever since I found a clarity about the direction of my life by working through 'What Colour is Your Parachute', I have frequently found myself in conversation with people of similar outlook, and that cannot be put down to coincidence.  It is about attitude, and flowing with the energy around you.
This may sound ridiculous to some of you but let me put it another way...

E is for Energy

If you're into physics and/or you've read Dan Brown's "Angels and Demons", you will be aware of the advances in modern physics made through using the particle collider at CERN.

Elsewhere there is the Principle of Uncertainty, and the gradual realisation that even Einsten's theories of relativity are not as all-encompassing as was once thought.

To put it as simply as possible, even at a sub-atomic level, there are fields of energy.  The Principle of Uncertainty states that it is impossible to know the exact weight AND speed of a particle.  As you approach one value or the other, it evaporates.  Most often, these are not called particles at all anymore, they are described as 'probability density fields' and/or 'energy packets'.

Sometimes the appearance is more particle-like and sometimes more wave-like.

And what scientists are slowly realising is that each of these energy packets, through every action, affects those around it, and this ripples out ad infinitum as in the theory of Chaos tenet:

It has been said something as small as the flutter of a butterfly's wing can ultimately cause a typhoon halfway around the world. - Chaos Theory

It seems the Chaiticians have been right all along, and more so than they realised.

And it is what we all must realise: every action we take or refuse to take has consequences.  Don't worry about it, just try things and see where the energy leads you.  We're still in control, we can change our minds, back up, switch directions at any moment.

E is for Empowerment

It's time to reach out.  It's time to be great - hell, it's time to be awesome!!

We're back at empowerment.  I'm not saying I've empowered you, but I find that the easiest way to feel empowered, is to empower others.  So, what are your skills, talents, interests?

Now take them and use them to empower someone else.

Two final things for you.  The first is a YouTube video created by Tony Robbins that inspires me hugely.

The other is a logical next step, I think.  There are literally millions of people out in the world who are more empowered than anyone most of us have ever met.  And the only thing that stands between them and their dream of a better life for their families and their community, is a loan of $25.

I don't know about anyone else, but that's less than I spend on my bus pass every week.

Here's to Kiva Microfunds and a revolution that WILL empower the human race.